Man, the cream has already risen, and we're left with dogs who have at least lost to RANKED teams!
1. LSU (5-0) – Winners of a “road” game, they may be the most fortunate MNC contender, schedule-wise, that I have ever seen. If LSU doesn’t win the BCS title, Les Miles should never be allowed to coach again.
2. Ohio State (5-0) – Ho hum. Nice defense.
3. USC (4-0) – The Huskies are not weak, but considering what Ohio State did in Washington, USC should have been better. Then again, maybe merely avoiding the upset bug is enough for them this week.
4. South Florida (4-0) – Are they this good? Maybe not, but with all the upsets, they had the most impressive win of the unbeatens. Then again, maybe WVU is just soft. They’ve really killed themselves two years in a row against USF, so it’s time to give USF credit for that.
5. California (5-0) – Holding the Ducks to 24 points and four turnovers while only winning by seven points says more about Oregon than it does about Cal. But hey, their defense did the job, and their offense did the job, ON THE ROAD. LSU couldn’t win a road game like this, that’s for sure. Although we’ll probably never find out, will we?
6. Boston College (5-0) – I don’t even know who they played this week. But who cares? They won. In all seriousness, though, they needed to beat UMass by more points than that.
7. Arizona State (5-0) – The Pac-10 has three undefeated teams in my Top 7. They are in Sagarin’s Top 8. Les Miles, you better win the MNC, because if you lose it to a Pac-10 team, you should never be allowed to coach again. Oh, and Harbaugh? Stanford sucks.
8. Wisconsin (5-0) – Sparty had two chances to tie or win in your house, and you pretty much got lucky, Mr. Badger. But hey, wins are wins when so many others in the Top 25 lost. Kudos, and as I said earlier, you’re beginning to look a lot like Ohio State did in 2002. Nothing wrong with that.
9. Kentucky (5-0) – FAU? Seriously? Why do SEC teams schedule like pussies? Either way, they avoided the upset bug. That has to count for something.
10. Missouri (4-0) – Bye weeks are nice, especially when everyone else is losing.
11. Purdue (5-0) – They beat Notre Dame, and they didn’t look good doing it. That says more about the Irish than it does about the Boilermakers, though. I mean, Notre Dame can’t suck forever, right? Right? RIGHT?!
12. Cincinnati (5-0) – Along with USF, they are now in the driver’s seat for the Big East’s BCS spot. Man, they just beat each other up in that league! Pounded a state school on the road, as they should have.
13. Hawaii (5-0) – Another blowout win for Colt & Co. I am rooting them to bust the BCS this year, of course, just like Boise State and Utah did in the past few years.
14. Connecticut (5-0) – Comparative scores are nice. UConn beat Akron by more than #2 Ohio State did. I am surprised they are still undefeated, but hey, they keep winning, right? Right? RIGHT?!
15. Kansas (4-0) – Hey, even better than scheduling a cupcake, they had a bye week! And they’re officially the worst of the remaining unbeatens in the FBS. Don’t expect them to stay here long …
16. South Carolina (4-1) – The run of SEC also-rans can begin now. No shame in losing road games to LSU, I guess. Oh, and my list, the only one-loss teams who make it are the ones who lost to still-unbeaten teams.
17. Oregon (4-1) – The only problem I have with them losing is that they should have been able to beat Cal at home, but they kept giving the ball away. When you lose a close one like this, you question all your efforts and focus on every little mistake you made. This loss will have psychological damage to the Ducks. It would have been better for them to lose by 30 points than to lose the way they did.
18. West Virginia (4-1) – Wow, you really suck, Mountaineers. Slaton? Say good bye to your Heisman. White? You just entered J.J. Stokes Territory with that thigh bruise. Pussies, all of you. Truthfully, I hope they lose to Louisville, Cincinnati, and every other team in the Big East from here on out. What a bunch of cunts.
19. Michigan State (4-1) – The difference between the past and the present? In the past, when Wisconsin took a 10-point lead in the third quarter, Sparty would have rolled over and lost by 20+ points. But don’t congratulate them yet: they blew two relatively good chances to tie or win the game late. However, with Northwestern and Indiana up at home next, Sparty should be 6-1 when they play at Ohio State. If they’re not, well – then they’re still the same ol’ Sparty.
20. Illinois (4-1) – They were a sleeper this year, and they are now officially off the sleeper list. Clearly, Penn State sucks, though. Zooooooooooooooooook!
21. Nebraska (4-1) – Their only loss was to an unbeaten team, even if it was a blowout at home that they were supposed to be fired up for. This is not a good team.
22. Virginia Tech (4-1) – This is not a good team, either, but their only loss was on the road to an undefeated team. Even if it was a huge ass-fucking, even bigger than the one USC gave the Cornhuskers …
23. Georgia (4-1) – No shame in losing a to a team who’s only loss was to a team that lost at LSU, right? Right? RIGHT?!
24. Kansas State (3-1) – Since their only loss was to Auburn, and it was on the road, they get the nod for this spot. Are they better than Florida, Oklahoma, Texas and Rutgers? On paper, probably not. But on the field, they’ve earned this spot for Week 5.
25. Florida (4-1) – They should have known better than to lose to Auburn at home. You cannot lose to unranked teams at home, Urban Meyer!
Others receiving consideration, in order:
Clemson, Florida State, Oklahoma, Boise State, Texas, Rutgers, Texas Tech, Miami-FL, Texas A&M, UCLA and Virginia
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